there's no world outside;

just beautiful @11:25 PM

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Spent the day with better half and mimi today. We were the ultimate camera whores the whole time. Lol. We ate and we shopped and we ate again. In between, we took tons of photos. What bliss hor. ~grins~ And mimi took my doughnut home to devour. =( I figured i owe everyone the truth. =p After mimi went off, we proceeded to funan to wait for stomper to knock off. Man it was a long long wait. 3 hours in fact. We ended up having dinner at 10 plus. =( At least i have got some photos to show for the day. ~laughs~
Ps: darlings, 'm sorry that i didn't get to meet u guys at esplanade. We'll meet up soon ok? =)

Me, my better half and by affiliation, my best friend. Lol.

Are we toot or are we toot? Ha

The three of us together..

Let's take a moment to ponder ok..

Nice anot? Me and mimi leh..

Me leaning against mimi..oops

I love this picture of me and better half!

just beautiful @11:20 PM

Kana boxed by my own better half! What is the world coming to?!

This is my better half. Not at her best 'm afraid. =p

And my one and only mimi..~laughs~

The silly billies..

And again.

And again. Lol.

Better half at her tallest moment... ~grins~

Look at her wide toothy smile. She is really so happy to tower over yt hor!

After effects!

just beautiful @12:47 AM

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

We may have became a little dotty i fear. =)
Took some pictures after the whole presentation anyway. And boy 'm i glad it's over. The MOR presentation i mean. Lol. Really terrifying i think. I've never liked representations. It brings out the babbling self in me. Yikes. Ha. I speak like a bullet train, or so i'm told. =( I'm so so relieved that there's no more such representations in this semester. But i still had to rush to work. Geez. How to manage coherent thoughts when i had only little sleep the last few days. This will not do! =p

All in all

just beautiful @11:25 PM

Monday, August 29, 2005

Sorry about not blogging people. I was really really busy with school and work.
Now that i finally have some time to myself. I can recollect. And blog. =)
Ok to date, my days have like this (vaguely):

17 aug
Woke up early coz i wanted to get a egg mcmuffin for breakfast before my OE lecture starts. I must be a nitwit. Didn't know how to get from clementi to school so i took a cab Again. Cost me as much as it would have from my place to school. =( But i did get to eat what i want. =) It was another day of to-dos for MOR. Went jurong point with them (THEY) so as to do our interviews with the respective fast food restaurants. But ended up only doing it with Mos Burger. Anyhow, we had LJS for lunch and there the teasing started again. THEY keep laughing at my enormous appetite and something else that i don't quite remember. Nevermind, da ren bu ji xiao ren guo. Or something like that. ~laughs~ Even though they were laughing at me, ok laughing with me coz i was laughing too, i did have a fun time. Especially when yongtang 'generously' offered his coin pouch for my usage. I ordered a chocolate dessert pie. Yums! Thanks yt! =) For dinner, we had canadian pizza ordered in! Too bad i couldn't really enjoy it coz of my bloody gastric. Oh and i met the nicest taxi driver ever! Coz he offered to bring me to the doctor and also to get me some warm teochew porridge when he heard that i had gastric. So nice hor? =)

19 aug
For the past few days, we have been working on our MOR. The discussion room have easily became our favourite hanging out spot. Lol.

21 aug
Geez. I really really wanted to start my day early and get things done. Apparently 'm still the lazy loafer i was before. =( Well, got up in the afternoon and went off to the library to get some reference books for ER. But didn't really turn up anything except a weird stalker. He kept talking to me. Being the very polite person that i was, i replied back. And he went on and on. I went upstairs and he followed suit. What was i to do? Haiz. Luckily i met one of my schoolmate and i cling to her like mad. And there's that. Ha.

Went off to meet justin for movie and dinner at orchard. Been like eons since i last saw him. We had marche and we both had huge sausages for dinner! Slurps! We watched must love dogs. I love it! Ha. Hadn't been this relaxed since i don't know when. ~laughs~

23 aug
School library books were dued at 845am so i had to drag myself out of bed in order to get to school on time. =( Stayed at the library for 4 whole hours to look for ER books again. Swee hor. Then went event gurus with better half to return timecards and uniforms. Pay's coming soon! =p

24 aug
Did MOR today again. Before going off, yt passed me some tea leaves. So nice of him hor. He gave all 5 of us two packs can. I earnestly think he's a SNAG. Lol. 2 days to go and i haven't start on my ER essay. Bite me. =(

25 aug
Only woke up at 11 something. Tried to work on ER but was suffering from stomachaches. I suspect it it must have been something i ate. But then again i didn't had anything since the day before. =( And so i went back to sleep. Ha. I did wake up again ok. Had to work on ER ma. But damn my stomach hurts.

26 aug
Had to skip ER lecture to finish my essay. =( Handed it in but realised don't have a freaking title! Grrr. Luckily got yt, raz and chen yu's help. Thank you sweeties! And i learnt how to do content page leh. Lol. Did MOR again at our favourite hang-out. We meet like almost everyday lo. ~hee~

Met elvin to have ice-cream at this place near holland V. Darn cheap and nice! Only $2.50 for this moderately big cup. We shared some mousse too. It was fantabulous! ~grinz~ Went walas but was full house so we decided go have our dinner elsewhere first and then go back since we already paid for the drinks. I have developed a liking for lychee martinis ever since then. Lol.

27 aug
Went for BF lecture and sorta reconcile with better half. We both apologised. See this is what being good friends are all about. Felt sOo much better immediately. Coz although we didn't really had a fallout, it was weird man. The tautness and hostility. =(

Went to eat the cheap ice-cream again with better half. Ha. We love cheap stuff! Being the better half she is, she let me drag her all the way to HMV to get my havaianas. Ain't she great? Lol.

28 aug
Slept at 6am coz was rushing the powerpoint slides for our MOR presentation. Had to wake up at 9am to go to work. =( How i wish i could stay in bed. But i also need to sustain my spending habits more. Ha. Went for a little retail therapy after work. Really little. Bought 2 belts and a bottom. Oops. =p

That's about it. =)

Being bullied into submission

just beautiful @11:04 PM

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

I don't know whether to laugh or to cry. Somehow during all this MOR group discussions, i became the laughingstock. =(

THEY said THEY realised i talk more when i have food in my mouth. Thus THEY came up with the idea to feed me every 15 minutes or so in order to sustain my attention span. Especially when i start to become sleepy. It's the best way, according to them, to retain my momentary attentiveness. Boo hoo.

Never mind, at least they provide me with f0ood! Lol. That same day, i had yongtang's 3 toby bars. Yums. =). I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Sweet!

In case you have no idea, THEY= chen yu, tricia, raz and yongtang. =p

Hanging by the moment

just beautiful @10:30 PM

I'm a little cranky. And looney. Coz i barely slept these few days.

I can count the hours of sleep i had for the last 3 days with my fingers.

I would give anything and i mean anything to just sleep for one whole day.

I think 'm only surviving on adrenaline.

My patience is wearing thin.

A mad dash to the finish line

just beautiful @11:52 PM

Monday, August 15, 2005

It has been a helter-skelter kind of existence today. Never sloughed so hard for an assignment or waste so much money on cabs before. =(

When i got home from work(er not to forget my manicure too) last night, i started working on my MOR essay. I only had like my introduction done. So i have tons of words to spew out in a matter of hours. At this point in time, i can't help but curse myself for my sloth and my nonchalance.

Sleep has never seemed so elusive. =(

At 430am, my brain fizzled out on me. I had to retire to that hazy space whereby things became incoherent, sorta.

Woke up at 7.30 so that i can make a beeline for the loo.

From then on, i typed non stop till about 12 plus. Thank god i did finish.

If i wasn't rushing to work, i would be deliriously happy coz i managed to finish ahead of time. 5 hours left to boot!

No time to spare as i had to reach my workplace by 130pm. I changed in my usual slapdash manner and then took a cab down to school com lab to print out my work. It was already 1 plus when i handed in my essay. No choice again but to flag another cab down. =(

Went in close to 230. Darn still so late.

At least i handed in my essay. =)

Remind me not to leave my work to the last minute.

A glitch

just beautiful @10:48 PM

Sunday, August 14, 2005

WTH. I distinctly remember that i was supposed to work afternoon shift. Of cuz i'll sleep in right. Subsequently received a call at 11 to say i work morning shift. Why wasn't i there yet.. That kinda thing. My time's very packed lo. Time management is extremely crucial for me. Do you really think i would make that kind of mistake? Grrr! I even jotted it down in my schedule book. Had to take a bloody cab down too.

Tomorrow's the deadline for MOR. Shit. Haven done much.

I still went to do my nails just now. For two hours. I must be mad. Someone pinch me please!

Emotions running amuck

just beautiful @12:25 AM

Saturday, August 13, 2005

I wish i could shoulder it for you. The angst, the doubt that creeps after you like a dark cloud. You have became a shadow of your old self. It pains me. To see that facet of you. You keep assuring me that you are fine. But i can see that you are not. I don't know why but i feel so afraid for you. You are all caught up in it. No turning back. That's what scares me. You are the toughest and most unwavering among the three of us. When you teared in front of me and try to appear strong still, i almost broke down. And you ask me not to cry for you. How could i not? You are one of my closest friend. And i can't help you except be there for you. You know that right? No matter how busy i am, i will always have time for you. I love you, darling.

To better halfs!

just beautiful @1:19 AM

Friday, August 12, 2005

Dear better half, i love your sexy soothing voice! Taking a line from stomper, it's music to my ears. Lol. And i'm not digging it in ok. =)

Yes, we finally finally got to watch charlie and the chocolate factory! Sweet! And i got coerced to hang out with you and stomper. Ha. Nevermind, now that me and stomper are best friends (albeit one-sided), it will work out. Lol.

On a serious note, i really had fun with you just now. Laughing over the silliest things and cracking up at the slightest provocation. Look, we even agreed on the silent code of ethics! Ha. Goodness me, i can't fathom why we only became such good friends at the beginning of this year. The day i made that phone call to you was my lucky day. You could have brushed me off with some flippant words. But you didn't. I'm glad. I don't care if i sound like a lesbian or what. But i love you to bits la. =p Because of the OE pair work, we spend even more time together. It could have driven us apart but it didn't. Now i miss hanging out with you. Lol. Anyways, better halfs forever! ~smiles~

Let's dance to the music

just beautiful @3:54 AM

Thursday, August 11, 2005

I'm so tired i can hardly see straight. =(
Good news is finally handed in OE. 1 down 5 to go! ~shudders~
To let our hair down, better half and i went to catch bewitched! Lol
Then on a crazy whim, we wanted to go zouk.
But being our conceited selves, we rushed home to change.
Reached zouk close to 12 in the end. Ha.
I quite like it there, albeit my first time at mambo on wednesday.
Danced till the cows come home. ~laughs~
We left at about 3.
Thanks for sending me back, my dear better half and stomper.

What's new?

just beautiful @1:59 AM

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Oh and i did a bit of shopping today. =)
Bought two tops and a bottom as well.
I was merely trying to do a little retail therapy.
It helps you know. Ha.
Gosh, i'm really dying for a manicure and pedicure.
My lord, i sound like a bimbo sometimes.
Don't i? =(

A special occasion

just beautiful @10:52 PM

Monday, August 08, 2005

I bought two slices of cake for my dear daddy. Coz it's his birthday! Lol. Hey i'm not stingy ok. My daddy don't like me buying him stuff. So all i can do is say,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DADDY DEAR!

And i love you too. =)

Snapped

just beautiful @9:16 PM

Sunday, August 07, 2005

I feel diminished. Taken for granted. Truly i'm so sick and tired of everybody disappointing me. At some level. Letting me down. Forgetting how i feel.

I'm quite mobbed too you know. I cant just change my plans anytime i want to. Don't assume i'm free all the time. I'm not. I have already pushed everything aside. I don't even have time for myself.

I'm so utterly exhausted.

Every iota of emotion is screaming at me to get out.

I need a breather before i lose it.

Torn to shreds

just beautiful @6:42 PM

I felt this odd sense of detachment after what i heard. Truth be told, i can't feel anything anymore. I shudder involuntarily when i learn about the deceit. It may not have meant anything to you. But it's a colossal thing for me. Just like that. Trust plummeted. No grounds needed.

I really hate this. This emotional roller coaster. I have to, need to get off before i get seriously dizzy. Why is everyone putting on a facade? It is exhausting holding on to that mask, isn't it? If it didn't mean the same to you like it did to me, you shouldn't have said all those things. I despise you for all your duplicitous actions and words. I wish you would just get out of my life so that i can live my own in peace.

Sometimes we are more alone then we want to admit.

A tribute

just beautiful @1:35 AM

Isn't it funny. How it hit me now.
At the most unsuspecting of times. How much my parents love me.

I always forget. Always.
The things they do. Or they try to do.
To the best of their abilities.

That should have given me an idea. The depth of their love.
I'm sure i have let them down.
I don't know where to begin.
To express how remorseful i feel.

I'm sorry if i ever make you sad.
I love you, mokmok.
I love you, daddy.

I already missed them.
I ought to spend some quality time with them.
I need to.

Pitter-patter

just beautiful @12:50 PM

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Why is it always raining when i go for my driving practicals? Really, this has got to stop. My favourite pair of trusty black phoenix shoes are now damp, soiled and grainy. :(

Time to get a new pair! ~Lol~

Nah.. Half kidding..

A rough day

just beautiful @1:14 AM

Another of those drudging wednesdays. Spent an entire day at school. Almost like history repeating itself. With a few differences of course. Late for OE lecture (yes again, can anot?!), had MOR project discussion and then to the library to look for references. This time, stayed till the library closed. Impressive uh? =p

I only had one lunch today though. ~disappointed~

It was a little weird. The vibes i mean. Between me and better half. But it was unmistakably there, beneath the surface. Simmering. I was so miffed at her today. At everything she did or did not do. Grrr! Tension tension..

When i'm aggravated, i don't like to say much. Trying to keep it in, to myself. But on the bus ride home together, she broke my silence with something akin to her being so annoyed at me. The well broke. I was speaking furiously, each word tripping over each other. And there better half started laughing. Gracious, so rude right? Lol. Laugh after i finish my tirade ma. Tsk. Ha.

Think no harm done ba. Hor, better half? *cross my fingers thrice for good measure* ~Ha~

If i may say so

just beautiful @12:23 AM

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

The only good thing that came out of today was that i sold my panasonic x800 for $300 when i had merely bought it for a paltry $148. Not bad for an amateur. =p

In mourning..

just beautiful @10:43 PM

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

I'm devastated. Numb. Desolated. Whatever you call it. Dumbledore is gone. Heck. Yes that means i have finished the book. Under 7 hours in fact. *weak smile*

There is no doubt in my mind that he will come back. He's a wizard for god's sake! Even so, i can't help but feel dismayed by his sudden demise. I read about his slaying while the bus lurched forcefully forward. Unshed tears. Blurred words. I couldn't believe the enormity of it. I almost didn't want to read anymore.

But i did.

And life goes on.

I got it!

just beautiful @2:42 PM

Monday, August 01, 2005

At last. Amidst all the pandemonium. I bought the sixth book in the harry potter series. Like finally lo. ~roll eyes~

Other people have already finished reading. Yes you, better half! Who can't stop herself from unveiling the events to me. The unsuspecting one. =(

I'm only going to materialize out into the mortal world when i have completed the book.

So long.

Off with you!

just beautiful @12:40 AM

I realised i don't have the right to get angry. But i'm. No disputing that fact. You played the game with such ease. I can't. Its odd how you can subject me to bouts of anger in an instant. Unsettling even. But i swear to protect myself from now on. Your actions or rather your inactions have cost you cosmic brownie points. Too bad.